I’m the first to admit I’ve gone a touch weird in the last 48 hours.
I’m incredibly restless and sleep is hard to come by. You know that feeling where you want to nap but can’t stop moving/thinking/scratching your hair – well that’s how I feel constantly. I’m exhausted but get sudden energy bursts and want to fold literally every piece of clothing in the house so it’s neat – and then I’m back on the couch re-watching Gossip Girl (and it is just as good the second time round FYI!).
I am huge. When I go for my daily walk I feel like a bowling ball is about to fall out. I can’t roll in bed without grunting and whispering into the darkness, “Will, you gotta help me!” And don’t even get me started on my feet. They’re not puffy – they are just somehow bigger – and I am telling the universe right now that if I don’t fit into my beautiful boots after this pregnancy is over… there’ll be trouble.
And then there’s the bathroom – I wee all night – at least 6 times. Yes that likely means this baby’s head is low and things should be happening – but how low can you go? Seriously!
I knew my hormones were slightly erratic this week but when the car seat was fitted and I had a small cry I knew that perhaps things had escalated. Yes, I cried. I felt overwhelmed, tired and irritated – “why are you still in there baby? Come out, we want to meet you- we have a seat for you now!!” But also a pang of – “crap so you drive around with this precious bundle in the car? Do I need to get a special license for this?”
I think the overwhelming emotion is utter excitement – “I could explode” kind of excitement. My husband summed it up perfectly when he said “It’s like someone saying – Christmas could be any time in the next 2 weeks – you wake every morning thinking – is today the day?” Perfectly said honey! Every twinge I feel I hear my brain scream – “is this Christmas?” – but nope – still no damn presents under the tree!
So hello to 39-weeks!
I’ve started questioning the universe – are the last 3 weeks of pregnancy really necessary? I recall having said to my patients before – “this is the good time when the brain develops – just stick with it” – oh sweet innocent Preeya – you had no idea! No idea at all!
So back to the couch I go – to patiently wait, catch up on the Upper East Side and wait for Santa!!